Hello everyone.

Well it’s been nearly 6 weeks since I left bangkok to travel to london to be with my father. It’s been an exhausting though satisfying time and I’m so glad I came over. Having got Bob back after it’s 2nd unplanned ‘holiday’ I was able to enjoy some riding through the beautiful Surrey countryside.

The main focus has been on clearing dads house out ready for sale. Over 4 weeks of removing, clearing and cleaning out his home it was on the market….and sold within days! So that was wonderful and I was glad I could contribute to getting his affairs in order. Dad remains in a care home which overall is pretty good place. His mental acuity is most discernible declining, as is his mobility and control over bodily functions, but there were always glimpses of his humour and approach to life which made us all smile, laugh and be grateful. The key thing is he is now safe, cared for and relieved of a home which he was never going to return to which provides him with financial security and perhaps choices in his care arrangements going forward.

So with a heavy heart I left Surrey on Tuesday to ride the 197k to my rellies in Great Dalby, in the midlands of England. That was a shock to the old system but I managed it, somehow….though have felt a bit rough and stuffed these last few days. It’s been wonderful to catch up with my extended family up here, but it’s time to turn the pedals again tomorrow. The next stage is to ride to Pembroke in Wales to catch the ferry to Ireland….no more planes for now as I rather like Bob can can’t risk another bike holiday sans rider!!

I’ll hopefully post every few days, not least so my Niamh can read what her mad dad is up to! I’m looking forward to some lovely English countryside and the welsh highlands….I might not say that when I’m slogging up them but I’ll moderate my daily distance so as to really enjoy the landscape.

I hope that each of you reading this are happy and healthy. I look forward to sharing my onward journey and reflections. Take care everyone.

Soooo…..after what was an eventful flight with a child directly behind me screaming for about 4 of the 12 hours (I sensed he was a young child with special needs) I arrived in london…..but my bike did not. Does that sound familiar??? You simply could not make this shite up. So my earlier post about considering the possibility that the universe is conspiring to take an enormous dump on me at every turn took one step closer to moving from hypothesis to fact! I think I actually cried. And of course the dance began again ‘so, Dr Kemp, if you fill out this form we will start the process of locating your bike and oh, any questions, just call this number’. What they should say is ‘sir, I know I might appear to care but I actually don’t give a shit as we have your money. And that number to call….no one will answer it’. As it so turned out it was an answering machine which was ‘full’ so you couldn’t leave a message 🤣🤣😡😡.

Sunday: Pluviophile ☔️

The place I stayed in Sunday night was divine! I was greeted with coffee and toast and a sandwich for the road in the morning…now that’s what I call hospitality. I was greeted also with rain and wind, as predicted! Whilst the first thirty Ks were wet, it wasn’t too bad -it’s a quirk of mine (one of many I’m told!) that I ride best in the rain (hence ‘pluviophile’ 😊).

I made good progress – I found myself with only 60 to go and it was only 9 in the morning, but with impending monsoon type weather in the offing I simply wanted to be safe and get to Hua Hai even if that meant sitting in a coffee shop for a few hours….such is life 🤣

Sunday-Tuesday:
Lesson 7654…Read the reviews 🤣

There’s a reason a place you’ve picked is cheaper than comparable hotels in the area….the clue is often in the reviews of the place 🤣. Lesson 7,654 of this trip. I booked in to a small hotel in a town dominated by high rise hotels and resorts, which I hate. As I cycled down what was a car/moped free zone, it starts to dawn on me that this place is, well, situated in a part of town frequented by ‘ladies of the night…’ except here it seems to be morning, noon and night! But I had paid for the accommodation and in talking to the delightful old lady who was the hotel proprietor I was assured it was safe and not too noisy! Turns out she was wrong…,or deaf!

I was saddened by the sight of old men being entertained by young women. I felt like I was ‘one of them’ – older man on my own in this part of town, so I stayed in my hotel room and read my book and rested best I could. Thankfully the more sickening and hideous side of life here, of very young women being forced in to prostitution, was not visible tho I sensed that it was hiding in plain site for those that sought it. The whole place had an air of sordidness. I guess along with the temples, coastlines and rolling hills there is an underbelly which is an integral part of this place as those aspects. During my stay in Hua Hin I had really good opportunities to talk to cafe owners and locals about this situation and got some really good insights and perspectives which I had not considered before – didn’t always agree, but it’s humbling to hear the ‘word on the street’.

Tuesday: Don’t bother reading the reviews!

Such is the contradictory nature of Thailand that when I did remember to read reviews of hotels…..I discovered that are…. full of shite!! After Hua Hai I wanted quiet and rural, so found this raved about place beside a river half way to Bangkok. It was in the back arse of nowhere, but it had a restaurant and breakfast included so when I arrived I was delighted to see such a tranquil place with individual cabins. That soon turned to ‘you’re kidding’! Having booked in and got ready for a shower I looked around for a towel but alas…no towel. So I redressed and located the lady who booked me in….’No towels’. Oh. Ok. Oh, so when does the restaurant open? ‘No food- closed’ Oh shite, you’re kidding! So I put on my sweaty/wet cycling gear back on and buggered off before she had chance to tell me the bed was extra! After much searching I got myself in to a ‘homestay’ accommodation in the most divine part of Thailand I’ve been in – it was like a little Venice! And blow me down…,they had towels! But no food!

Wednesday- Bangkok.

124ks. I set off early to beat the heat and cleared 64k in two hours along what I now know was the motorway, where I wasn’t supposed to be 🤣. Then things got very messy – punctures galore, roadworks everywhere, and the traffic was, well, indescribable. I was thoroughly miserable. There simply was no enjoyment in trying to navigate, ride and have 360 degree vision, as any semblance of order disintegrated in to chaos, pure and simple. And dangerous. After more punctures I pulled on to the pavement on a side road and just said ‘I’m not enjoying this one bit’. Just then a young man approached to ask if I was ok – he owned the lumber yard I had parked up outside. He spoke English very well and, well, basically said ‘if you think that was hard you ain’t seen anything yet…,did you know this is the most dangerous road in the whole of Thailand! Actually, no, I didn’t! He showed me around his factory and we chatted for an hour. Then he said ‘I’ve ordered one of my staff to take you to where you’re going ….it’s simply too dangerous and soon you’ll hit toll roads and serious traffic. I didn’t hesitate! There’s being silly, then there’s down right stupid! As I travelled in comfort the final 30ks I could absolutely 100% confirm he was 100% correct – carnage. The roadworks were insane, the traffic off the charts. It took 1.5 hours in his car to do 30ks. He dropped me at the airport, I fixed my last puncture then rode to find my hotel, about 8k away. And even then I was stopped my traffic police because ‘you’re not allowed to ride on this road’. That was a problem as ‘this road’ was the only one which took me over the river in front of me’. I pretended to confirm I’d turn around and when they left….I rode over the bridge! My rebellious side is popping up more and more here! What was I supposed to do….get a fecking boat?

So….that’s the riding over with and to be honest after today….I’m not sorry. I’m going to box up Bob (yes, sad, I know, but my Bombtrack has a name…,to be said Rowan Atkinson style as Edmund Blackadder) tomorrow. A local bike shop has put aside a box for my trip to London.
Thanks everyone for riding with me. To be continued!

Finally want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to Jill for hosting and posting these last few months.

Today was blissfully restful! After getting the hell out of my ‘shed’/resort I booked in to a new hotel which was, well, a hotel! Prachuap is famous for its buddist temple Thammikaram Worawihan and its innumerable monkeys! There’s something like 350 steps up to it. So after having a coffee and egg sandwich at a ‘Coffee and Bike’ cafe I hit the steps. Made it nearly to the top before the mother of all monsoons came in. Within seconds I was soaked and it was dangerous with the winds sooo high. But it was definitely worth it to see the views and watch the monkeys 🙉!
Other than that I tried to refuel and just rest. The weather today has been persistent rain and it’s set in for the next three days so it’s going to be a very wet and windy ride tomorrow. But it’ll be a bit cooler so that’s a fair exchange!

I’m not a fan of fridge magnet pop psychology, not least as it takes most of its declarations from the Ancient Book of Old Wives Bollocks (thanks Lee Evans for that delicious phrase!) but I am someone who loves simple (not simplified) one liners that just capture a complex idea in a few words. I was listening to Gabor Mate last night and something he said really jumped out at me – how a ‘temporary state becomes a trait’. Those ‘temporary states’ might be fear, rejection, pain, abandonment, for example, from childhood, but they get locked in as traits (often disorganised, unhelpful, counter productive, defensive traits) in our adult behaviour. And then he posed a question – what is a ‘trigger’? He explored it in terms of a gun and how it simply causes a reaction, but the ammunition is inside the gun. His point – stop paying attention to the trigger and find what the ammunition is within me. Find that and disarm it, the trigger is disarmed to. Pay attention only to the trigger….the explosives remain intact! It’s really thought provoking. I’ve enjoyed the opportunity to not be riding and freeing me up to think about my inner explosives which are being activated, provoked or ‘triggered’!

When I sat down today to write about yesterday I simply couldn’t remember what I had done or seen, other than dogs and roadworks and more dogs! I know I clocked about 100k of undulating roads which in the main were pleasant. I did meet a mad German cycle tourist pushing his bike up a hill going the opposite direction. We stopped to chat and he told me about all his travels around the world. The only other thing of note was being chased by a three legged dog – it comes to something when even a dog with a disability is chewing at your tyres!! And of course there was the now compulsory rejection of being served food at street stalls on the road. One ‘shop’ owner just swore at me (as far as I could tell!) gesticulating to bugger off! So I did but not without returning serve!

I found my evenings rest place – right on the beach front again but a bugger to find! A local coffee place was still open and boy, he made the bestest coffee I’ve had since leaving Adelaide!

Tour de Travaux -Friday

I have a theory….improbable but….that my Maps app hates me, so it searches out a route which specifically takes in as many roadworks as possible. The evidence is overwhelming in support of this theory! One broken up road after another after another. And what makes a bike shaking experience even more entertaining are the water trucks who’s job it is to turn dry dust to slush just ahead of you 🤣. On one such (as there were many) episode I was absolutely sprayed with water then covered in mud head to foot! I had to stop after one very entertaining section, as my chain had got so clogged up it was, I swear, crying! Found a motorcycle shop and cleaned it off and re-oiled it and off we went to the next section!

And when it wasn’t tricking me in to taking every road which was being dug up it was cracking the shits because I would take a detour (because I had to) and it would feel like it was shouting at me….’left you muppet, left, left…LEFT! Except there was no ‘left’! On at least three occasions the road it was declaring was there….wasn’t! In the end I gave up and headed for the main road! I was getting tired and cranky and somewhat peeved at being chased over and over by dogs! I hate that. I really struggled today -4th day of over a 100 and my legs were declaring a ceasefire! My mood wasn’t helped when I got to the ‘resort’ only to find it was….in an industrial machinery car park area! Sweet god above! Place was full of diggers, workshops etc and tucked in the back were these 7 ‘huts’ ….sheds….which were the accommodation! It was my turn to crack the shits this time!! Anyway…..I was so tired and filthy I stayed, a decision rewarded by a huge plate of rice and chicken ‘on the house’( or shed). It did have the advantage that I could, once the rain stopped, wash my bike properly! But being located in an industrial area meant….no food! Getting pretty used to going hungry these days….been one of the real downsides to Thailand.

So I’ll camp out in my ‘shed’ tonight which actually, forgetting it’s location, is very comfortable, and I’ve booked in to another place tomorrow in the same town – rest day tomorrow before the final push to Bangkok 😊